These couple of weeks have been weird for me. Don't know why and how, but everything is not on the track. I have tried to make everything right, but it just became worse and worse. Hummm, dude, what's wrong?!
I am always floating somewhere, can not calm down, can not focus on now, can not treat every person as good as I can, can not be confident, can not finish what I was supposed to do, can not view this world in a peaceful angle. This is a torture, so I did something bad to myself. Until yesterday, don't know how, but somehow I was relief. I skipped class, had napped, canceled BBQ party but had Chinese foods one, had some great talks, watched the best Supernatural, got drunk, read Tavis again, and most importantly, had a great sleep.
One thing I know for sure, I should treat everybody equally. Don't bring my judgement into how I treat people. Everybody deserves my equal treatment. The second thing, be confident, really, I need to bring up the internal confidence that I never had. It would be hard, but can start from peacefully talking with my friends. Let's me try this with Scott and Natasha today. The third thing, treat myself well. Don't hurt myself. This is the stupidest thing ever, and I should not do it. Also, I need to keep curiosity to others, and have a heart that want to explore people around me. Last, enjoy the road trip this weekend! Roadtrip, oh, baby, it is awesome!
The weatherman said that there will be some thunderstorm this morning. I woke up with a cloudless sky and tons of sunshine. Hope this can keep going on.
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2 comments:
PaiPai^_^ Cheer Up, fish!
I want to see you happy as always. I do not know what's happening to you. Maybe you are the person that knows it best.
But I shall tell you that you have already done it quite well treating people. Those who appreciate it could feel. No need to pressure yourself. If you don't love yourself, you cannot love others. Taking care of yourself before taking care of others!
It will be sunny this weekend. Take care. Enjoy your roadtrip!
It could be always sunshine if you feel it in the heart:) Trust me!
Relax tt, dont push yourself too hard. Growing pains are good for you. Anyway, enjoy your last days at school~ The best time EVER, haha!
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